Shower’s use for men and women
How to shower like a women
Take off clothing. Place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror. Make mental note to do more sit-ups, leg-lifts, etc. turn on shower. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Use face, arm clot, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it’s clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with real passion fruit. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Get out of shower and stand directly on bathmat. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Squeegee off all wet surface in shower. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
How to shower like a men
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the ‘woo-woo’ sound. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Turn on shower, wash face. Spend majority of time washing privates. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds. Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bathmat. Dry off forearms and butt only. Draw a penis on the mirror.
Tags: Body Spa